mdunnbass ([info]mdunnbass) wrote,
@ 2009-08-18 15:28:00
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Current location:stony brook
Current music:Three is a Magic Number - Blind Melon covering Schoolhouse Rock
Entry tags:etiquette, facebook, friends

Facebook Friends Etiquette?
I've got a solid 4 or 5 updates floating around in my head, and given that yesterday was Holly's 1 month birthday, I am acutely aware that I haven't gotten around to publishing her birth story yet... In the meantime, this is one I've been mulling over for a few months now....

What is the etiquette for friending people on Facebook, seriously? I know that there isn't an established etiquette yet, but what to do? I'm friended mostly to friends from High school, college, various workplaces of the last decade, a handful of people I've met here on Livejournal, and relatives. That's all well and good, but what about the fringes of those groups?

Case in point- high school people. I've gotten friend suggestions for people that mocked and ridiculed me for 10 years, and even a few people who were actively hostile and physically aggressive against me. Not gonna happen. I've gotten friend requests from people that I knew of, but didn't know, and people that were most likely really cool people, but we just traveled in different circles. A handful of them i am now friended to, and I enjoy getting to know them as adults. And by now, I've gotten friend requests from a solid 5 or 6 people who I swear I never went to school with, and have never heard of in the slightest, but apparently are in my senior yearbook. Do I friend them or not?

There was a random guy a year ago who friended me with the same name as me. Pretty funny at first. He had over 100 friends all named permutations of 'Matt Dunn', but it got old fast, seeing all of his random updates, especially since he's 14, I'm 33, and we have NOTHING in common other than a name. So, I unfriended him.

Similarly, I'm friended to an undergrad who worked in a lab I was in a few years ago, and other than a few weeks over 2 summers spent in the same room, we have nothing in common. Do I remain friended to her, or delete her, essentially from my life?

What do you guys do in this type of situation?

No Worries,
Matt




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[info]starpush
2009-08-18 07:51 pm UTC (link)
My own "rules" are like this:

- When it comes to high school/college, if I recognize their name or even vaguely remember them I accept the request. It doesn't matter if we friends or even enemies because to me its ancient history and if they want to see what I'm up to I figure its either genuine interest or they want to compare my life to their own.

- I've gotten friends requests from my kids' friends and I take those on a case by case basis. If they're a kid who has been around our house/family a bit and know that I'm a music geek, pretty liberal, etc then I'll accept. It never goes the other way as I find it creepy to add anyone under 18 unless they are a blood relative.

I had a friend request from someone I thought was a stranger but it turns out we went on two dates in the 11th grade. I just never knew her last name. lol.

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